The Reluctant Mermaid

one woman unwilling to swim in the same direction as the others


All right... that's IT

I gotta get down to work here people.... I'm letting OTHER PEOPLE (AKA- manic ex co-workers) invade too much of my head space that should be filled up with sights of my children painting like Jackson Pollack, gleefully kicking up dusty sand in the communal sandbox at that hoity toity private school playground, the sound of thier voices (Iris waking up from a nap saying to me as I walk into the room, "Hi mom- dats you wawa (my water that I left on the windowsill) firss I saw you, den I saw you wawa!") and Sage ("mom- I'm so glad that you're my mom") and the smells of sweaty heads fresh from running around the assembly hall at church, and the smells of chlorinated pool skin after a terrific swim lesson... THESE are the things that should be in my head... NOT screaming banshee woman, not boss who has just given his employees BAD CHECKS (amen that I got a new job my friends), not my own insecurities screeching and blaring out my flaws to myself...

I'm done. I'm done letting this stuff get into me... I'm ready to get over it.

I have a meeting tomorrow night with Catherine... our minister, who I am seeking Buddhist Enlightenment from. She is a practicing Buddhist, as well as the minister of our Unitarian Universalist congregation and she did a sermon on Buddhism today and we all meditated... it was cleansing, it was devine. It was peace and love and more peace. I need her to guide me in letting all this go...


1 comment:

Jane said...

I hear everything you're saying here! It's funny when the time comes that you simply can not take one more ounce of chaos and negativity bestowed by other people.

I'm thinking of joing a Unitarian church near my house. I hear only great things about it!