I'm crying into my bowl of Au Gratin Potatoes while sitting on the news that I may be headed for another back surgery.
This was not the update I was planning on blogging for my triumphant return from the holiday festivities.
I was planning on talking about how wonderful it was to see Sage PLAY instead of bore himself silly. Just for the record, Erector sets are still good old fashioned fun.
I wanted to talk about how Iris was all ga-ga over Sage's Moon Sand booty and was like a woman with a mission to get her hands in it, and how I caved and bought her some of her own Moon Sand only to kick myself in the ass for assuming that this was an appropriate activity for a 2 1/2 year old wild child.
I wanted to mention the pull and the tug I've been feeling to create a sanctuary, a nest, a hive if you will... out of our home. To create comfort and warmth, safety, room to grow creatively, space to stretch all our wings. We're starting with the back office, the "time capsule" we call it... we're starting there to fashion a music room/ craft studio for Alex and I... and then we'll go from there with transforming the rest of the house into this haven of loveliness for our family.
I would have told about how we finally made the decision to try to get Sage into the local Charter School. Open House is in a few weeks, please, everybody reading this use all your connections to the Universe and it's mysteries to get him in...
I wanted to talk about how I taught myself to knit.... by watching YouTube.
How I made this and this and this... and want to make this.
But instead I'm sitting here... in so much pain... my back, which 3 years ago failed me and resulted in a discectomy and laminectomy is now failing me again... another herniated disc... pressing on another nerve root. This time it's hitting my back, my right hip and my right leg. This sucks. This could change everything.
But my hope is that it doesn't change my love of cooking and my love for my family and my love for my new-found art of knitting... my hope is that it's an easy fix to make a better me.
Until then, I'm just gonna sit her rockin' on with my cheesy potatoes.